For 2018

A sudden desire to reread The Alchemist again. It’s almost 10 years since first reading it. 2010 I believe, the years are getting blurry and how time flies year by year month by month week by week. Perhaps I really miss the feeling of potent wonder, magic of the universe and childlike hope that the fable transported me to. Used to be so boxed up in reality and practicality that I could never imagine how a fictional story could be of any good application other than to bring you to a fascinating dream world to escape from the drudgery of life.

Never did I expect how it would touch my heart and soul, this Shepard boy story. Nevertheless, myself don’t identify with Santiago, for all that he is, there is a tinge of dreariness to Santiago inner being or so I thought previously, which I don’t identify with in myself. Because I’m innately too optimistic perhaps. Or maybe I’m just not the overtly contemplative sentimental that Santiago is.
The most I like about Santiago is the expression of his vulnerability, the openness to vulnerability at the hands of destiny, the stars and the universe.

2018 is calling me to be vulnerable again, I have been feeling it for some time, and I feel ready. The knowing that the key at this time could possibly be to be open to being vulnerable to the dices of destiny, come what may. With the belief that it would always turn out to be right in the end, as Long as you surrender. Now I have so much strength than before, no longer the doubting, the fumbling, lost in the waves. Now I know I stand strong when the waves come but I know there is a good vulnerability around the corner.

2018 is the year of master number 11 and it will be a time of high sensitivity for everyone.

Recall all the past times when I followed my heart and know when it is right.

When the time is right, not before, not after. You will feel it in your bones.

I need to harness and connect to that vulnerability again. That destiny has a plan, maybe a guideline, and I’m finally feeling it, preparing for it, waiting for it.

How was I not intuned at all until perhaps 2011. I see the footprints of intuition now. How I wanted to learn violin bought a violin and later found out that was probably an indication that I would met someone who plays the violin orchestra. How I had a first vivid dream of an apartment that I would hunt down which later transpired exactly like my dream. How I make wrong decisions whenever I am anxious and later dream of leaving a job and ending up to be the right decision to be made. Perhaps the veil is getting thinner and thinner. I really hope I would grow at the same rate or even more in the next 10 years, what will it bring, how will I change, how would I feel looking back at now 2017 2018. Would I be able to see the hands of destiny clearly at play once more. As they say, a soul contract. Would I have better understanding and acceptance and rise up to fulfil my soul contract, I ponder.

Would I have resolved the conflicts of my beliefs? Seeing the balance in the play of free will and destiny or perhaps seeing that both are not the case or perhaps it is a case of alittle but of both. The secrets of the workings, would I have a conclusive illumination or would I just have to contend to have a chance to play to discover abit of both.